3 Awesome Benefits of Being Single

This was a guest post I wrote for Kingpin Social that allowed me to realize the benefits and awesomeness of being single so I can share it with you. Enjoy!

Special shout-out to Brian, an up and coming author for helping me edit this article!

It’s Friday night. You call up your best friend. The best thing to do would be to get hammered wasted at the Local Pub and talk about the week, right?! However he replies...

“Hey Bro. Can’t make the Pub tonight, I’m hanging out with the girlfriend."

So you're Single...Don’t worry, I feel you. And so do other single people out there. “I am single” you say to yourself, because that is reality, it just is. What you choose to make of it is up to you, because there’s a positive and a negative to every situation. You can choose to bask in the glory of being single, spending your free time meeting new people, or you can sit at home on your friday nights playing video games. The flipside is not always the easiest.

While dwelling upon the negatives, it’s not the easiest thing in the world to be single. Especially when it seems like “everyone around you is finding someone, but you.” This isn’t the truth, but now that you’re focused on the negatives (you being alone) it seems like you are the ONLY one that feels this feeling (you’re alone, right!?)  But hey, it’s not the end of the world. Besides it’s not like you’ll be single forever, just single for now. Right now is the present moment, and you should be embracing it!

This was a conversation I had plenty of times with a buddy of mine, which sparked this post. It simply went like this…

“Man I haven’t been laid in months!” says my buddy.

“Oh dude, tell me about it!” I replied.

Oh yes, the sexual frustration talks of single people. We’ve all been there at one point or another. Until you decide to take yourself seriously, the perils of single life can be seemingly devastating. Most people aren’t fortunate enough to have found their passion, so being single means that their free time is spent alone and unproductive.

Now first things first, I’m not writing to give you the step by step process on how to get laid. Nor am I going to share with you my sexual frustrations, that won’t be necessary. I will however share with you 3 Awesome Benefits of Being Single to survive while you’re on your own. Being single isn’t easy; however it can be awesome and simple at the same time.

So what are the 3 Awesome Benefits of Being Single?

You have more free time

Alright you're single, so I’ll say this as simply as I can…GO OUT AND HAVE FUN! Don’t use this time to mope and envy those who are in relationships! Use this time to enjoy activities by yourself. Enjoy the company of your friends and family, who probably misses your company! Also this is the perfect time to meet new people. You now have so much more time to do pretty much whatever you want with whomever you want. Use it to your advantage.

Upgrade yourself for the better

Since you have more time, use it in upgrading yourself. Hit the gym (you probably gained some love chub), learn a new language, read books that interest you (put down that PS3 controller and read!), go travelling, learn how to dougie, clean your room, get a new haircut style… the list is endless! Upgrade yourself to what your heart desires. When you upgrade yourself for the better, the quality of your life becomes better, including the women/men that you attract. Having skills and abilities makes one valuable. The more valuable you are, the more “high value” people you will attract into your life, friends and lovers.

Flirt (guilt free) 

I’m a huge believer that we are all natural flirts. And what’s the fun in being single if you don’t flirt. While you’re upgrading yourself, you’ll be exposing yourself to new experiences, knowledge and people (specifically the opposite sex). This is your opportunity to mingle with anyone, anywhere.YOU… ARE… SINGLE! Flirt with the cutie you’ve been eyeing at work, in the gym, at the coffee shop, in the airplane!

If you don’t know how to flirt or at the very least spark up a conversation, email me and we’ll talk, it’s easier than you think.

Being single isn’t the end for you; it’s actually a new beginning and a new chapter that you can write to your liking. It’s a new opportunity to focus and fall in-love with yourself.

Not only will you get a chance to get to know yourself on a personal level, but you will also get a chance to meet new people and gain new experiences. Being aware of the 3 AWESOME Benefits allows you to progressively move your life forward. This is an article you can read, deciding to take the first step towards self – betterment, and optimization of your single life. This could lead to having a kick-ass lifestyle and potentially even lead you to meeting that new special person that’s right for you.

Are you Super-Productive or Sort-Of Productive?

Lately I've been tinkering around with the idea that being busy, doesn't necessarily mean you’re productive. So I put it to the test. I set up two scenarios for myself.

Scenario #1 (S1) – Super-Productive

I put myself in a situation where I had no distractions, to keep my focus at an all time high. I deactivated my Facebook, I turned off my phone, I went to the library, and organized and listed everything I wanted to accomplish that particular day. I was setting myself up to be Super-Productive.

Scenario #2 (S2) – Sort-of Productive

Obviously the opposite of #1; Facebook was in front of me (even Twitter), I had a book out, I was on Google Reader catching up on my subscriptions, I was texting friends and I was at my favorite coffee shop. My work was still laid out in an organized and listed fashion to be accomplished that day. I was set-up to be Sort-of Productive.

I know what you want to ask me, “So which Scenario allowed you to get the most work done?”

“It’s obviously Scenario #1 right?”

Well the answer is NEITHER surprisingly and I’ll tell you why.

S1 did keep me away from all the distractions I mentioned above except for one; CRAVING! I was craving to check my Facebook and my phone which took a lot of my focus away from actually doing my work. When I would start to work on something, I’d get distracted by my craving to do something else. And I know I’m not the only one that goes through this craving.

On the flip side S2 is an obvious one. Since I had all these distractions readily available, I was distracted 80% of the time I was trying to work. I would be reading feeds, glancing over my book, responding to my text messages and drinking a boat load amounts of coffee, so I was wired to be distracted.

So since the first 2 scenarios didn’t work, I had to find another way; bringing me to Scenario #3.

Scenario #3 – Rewarductive

Back when I was 8-9 years old, my parents bought a poster that they posted on my room door. It was a Chores Poster. They listed chores they wanted me to do and once I accomplished it for the day, week or month, I would receive a reward that I wanted. Based on how extensive the chore, the reward became awesome! 

So I decided to follow this same system now, just a bit simpler to boost my motivation. I would work for 1 hour straight, and reward myself with something I wanted to do. Believe me when I say that my productivity increased tenfold in that 1 hour that I worked!

I organized and listed “mini” manageable projects within my project that would take an hour (give or take a few minutes) and once completed, checked and re-checked. I would grab a coffee, or watch an episode of Two and Half Men, or take a powernap, and sometimes even play some Call of Duty.

The idea behind the third scenario is to create a system where there is less work, with high productivity without limiting yourself from doing the fun stuff. This built motivation to work hard during the hour and maintained efficiency, because I didn’t want to look over it during my reward periods, I wanted to play hard also.

Since you don’t limit yourself from success by working hard, why should you limit yourself from doing fun stuff by playing hard?

30oz Steak Productivity!

Reminiscing back when I was talking to a brilliant friend of mine, he altered my belief about staying productive through consistency rather than urgency.

He said…

“I don’t see why many people allow themselves to get caught up in such urgency to do many things at the same time and have really nothing to show for it in the end. Why not just take small incremental steps that are consistent, so that it’s manageable for you to see it through to the end, then move on to the next one.”

Recently I’ve been bombarded with tons of work projects and self projects; from engineering designs for work and lifestyle engineering for myself. Yes I’m busy with all these activities, and yes I got some things done, yet somehow I still felt unproductive because my main goals are still yet to be accomplished.

That’s when my brain quickly went to flashback mode and picked out what my friend told me about taking “…small incremental steps that are consistent…” I love how memories just appear out of nowhere and it completely reminds you what you have forgotten to help you out, it’s magical really.

Just like eating a nice 30oz steak cooked to perfection. You don't pull the whole piece in your mouth right away. First of all it's impossible, and worse of all you'll choke and probably kill yourself if you manage to force it all in at once.

Rather you take a steak knife, cut up the steak into little chewable nibblets and you savor the flavor of each piece you bite into. Consistently repeat this process of cutting small steak pieces, before you know it, you've managed to eat and enjoy a whole 30oz steak.

So ask yourself…

“Are you a victim of urgent activities with little to no desired results to show for it?”

If so, momentarily re-evaluate your current situation and pick just one activity or project to stay productive in and see it through to the end. Not only will you decrease your workload and stress, you'll enjoy doing it to the point where you will stay motivated to tackle what's next in line.

Bon Appetit!